Deflection Points
Modern football is increasingly reliant on fans' robust cognitive dissonance
If, like me, you’re watching the Premier League title race unfold from a neutral perspective, you’ll have enjoyed Sunday’s game and particularly the exquisite side eye offered by Erling Haaland as he walked past a camera after the final whistle. The striker’s war with Arsenal defender Gabriel has been raging for some time now but his goal in this game may end up being one of the most important he’ll ever score in terms of the Premier League narrative.
Rarely is smug an attractive state but in this case the Norwegian earned the right to act the shithouse.
As he strolled around the Etihad topless, long blond hair blowing gently in the breeze, he was creating memes in real time. We all knew it, but even as I was obediently reposting these images to my socials, I was aware of my complicity in enabling this pantomime. I complain about the influence social media has on football frequently but when something funny happens, you can guarantee I’ll be there with a smart remark and gif.
As a woman it can be hard to navigate the often fetid world of football. It’s always going to be this way if you obsess over this version of the game the way I and my friends do; the one played by extremely rich, talented young men who know little about the world but what it can give them. Humour and infantilisation are the lenses through which I can comfortably watch and love this world, training my eyes to focus solely on the wholesome aspects of the game in order to distract from its harsher, darker realities.
This is my version. Don’t be under any illusion though. Cognitive dissonance runs deep in football. It might even be essential to our enjoyment of the game. But a carefully honed ability to ignore what we don’t like and focus on the lighter side means the other stuff, the awful stuff, can easily creep past in the darkness we create at the edges.
Drunk driving, car crashes, coercive and controlling behaviour, rape, sexual assaults, violence against women. Footballers have been accused, to varying degrees, of all these crimes in recent years. You would find examples of these offences in any cohort of young men, but footballers will often escape proportionate consequences because of the value they represent to their fans, clubs, owners and the brand.
The manner in which Roberto de Zerbi rolled back his comments about Mason Greenwood recently upon his appointment at Spurs is an example of how flexible football can be when placed under pressure.
De Zerbi was appointed manager of Marseille in June 2024, a month before Greenwood joined the club on loan from Manchester United via Getafe. Upon Greenwood’s arrival, the Italian made the following statement about the player.
I don’t want to get involved in anyone’s private life. I don’t even get into the private lives of my children, because I want to give everyone their freedom.
All I can see is that Mason seems a good lad, he paid in a strong way for what happened. He has probably here found the right environment for him, which gave him affection, and held out its hand to him.
When I look at him as a person, I feel sad for what happened in his life, without getting into the details.
Because the person I know here is very different to the one that has been described, especially in England.
Greenwood enjoyed a great deal of success at Marseille but in April 2026, rumour had it that De Zerbi was set to replace Igor Tudor as Spurs manager. Several fan groups expressed opposition to the appointment because they felt the Italian had downplayed the severity of the allegations against Greenwood in 2022. It should be noted that the case against Greenwood was dropped before reaching court.
Spurs appointed him anyway and De Zerbi issued a statement on Spurs’ website shortly after.
I have never wanted to downplay the issue of violence against women, or violence against anyone more broadly. I’ve consistently fought and taken a stand to be on the side of those who are most at risk.
Those of you who know me well, will know that I’m not the kind of person who makes compromises to win more games or win an extra title.
I’m sorry if I offended anyone’s feelings with this subject matter. I have a daughter and I’m very sensitive to these things and I always have been.
I hope that over time people will get to know me better and understand that at that moment, I didn’t mean to take a stance.
It’s the kind of apology-by-committee we’ve come to expect. Emphasising how he’s a good guy, he’s got daughters, he’s not that kind of person. He’s on our side, goddamn you all! And to the football gods a plaintive wail of ‘I didn’t mean to take a stance,' as though the problem was the fact he spoken at all and nothing to do with what he said.
This isn’t a De Zerbi problem. He might be a nice bloke. He might be an awful bloke. I’ve never met him. He’s was just humming along. It’s not his fault the music stopped and he didn’t have a chair.
This is a football problem. We’re so desperate for football to be an escape. When it’s good, our game is a place where togetherness and tribalism can live side by side, fostering closeness and encouraging us to find common ground instead of points of difference. There are fewer and fewer places like this in the world.
But if it’s going to continue being the escape, we can’t rely on selective blindness. I can’t solve this by not posting memes about Erling Haaland. De Zerbi can’t solve this by assuming a position on the actions of another human being. But if all of us who love the game could maybe take a moment to decide what we’re prepared to tolerate and be more vocal about it, the game could be the source of pure joy we’re all intent on projecting.